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slow

July 8, 2018

why have You sent me
why is it that things I love
home and hopes I held
will be traded in for
gray static,
blank spaces in void unknown?

and why do I not thank You
but weep at Your feet,
mourning a life no longer mine
why do I hurt for loss
instead of await my gain?

I know it’s You there
in the blackness,
void I can’t see
and I know to follow
but I’m turned towards what I left,
knowing it will never look this way again
if only I could capture it,
keep it
or if only I could lengthen the hours,
buy a little more time
(and I’m sorry,
I really do know You hold it) 

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